Sunday, August 18, 2013

Kick Ass 2 - What just happened?


There were a lot of exciting movies that came out this summer and Kick Ass 2 was something I was uber excited about. Kick Ass has to be one of my all time favorite comic book movies due to the concept of a real life vigilante is fun to think about. As Kick Ass 1 was about Dave and his transformation story, Kick Ass 2 really felt more like Mindy's story with a Dave sideplot.

When I first saw it come out, it had a rating of 66%. This ended up plummeting to 23% within a few days as reviews came out bashing the movie. Even though this was not the best sequel [sequels are always a hit and miss], it still had some good moments. But you do have to sit through a lot of the bad pockets that make you want to tear your hair out.

Kick Ass had a lot of smoothing over to do. I really felt the Mindy high school girl acceptance side plot was a total distraction. Mindy [or Hit Girl] is some one I just don't see following anyone blindly to fit in. This is a girl that has murdered people on her own and home schooled on the side. So lets just toss her into society without any transition whatsoever. Great idea, pops!

I'm surprised her new father had no practical sense on how to transition her knowing her history. I doubt she had friends growing up...or social skills in general besides making smart ass remarks. And to force her to make friends...with the popular girls? WTF was he thinking?

Also WTF was this sexual awakening bull shit? You don't watch a N'Sync wannabe video and all of a sudden go boy crazy! What the crappity crap is that about? You could not think of a better intro into the high school boys thing? And what is up with these girls and that nasty talk behind closed doors? Its just down right creepy. Do girls talk like that in high school now? I never talked like that in high school.

Everything the writers did to the epically cool Mindy was instantly trashed, watered down and distanced from the Hit Girl persona. I super disliked the softer side of Mindy because her main character was to be a crime fighting cold-hearted bitch with a snarky attitude. I loved that about her in the first movie and just like her, it felt like the whole second movie had an identity crisis of what kind of message it wanted to get across.

Now lets go back to Dave...who is also trying to figure out how he fits back into society after some how miraculously getting away with being Kick Ass and killing a bunch of people, surviving torture, and watching a man immolate in front of his very eyes. Why is this boy not whimpering in his bed in the fetal position? And where was his girlfriend in this film?

She just shows up to dump him over a vague misunderstanding. That seemed like a way too convenient lead way into him banging Night Bitch every Justice Forever Pow Wow. Which was holistically pointless as they never stay together any way, leaving room open for a possible Dave and Mindy romance [which is a huge no no in my book...they are pretty far apart in age in the comics].

And WTF is up with Chris D'Amico? He just goes bat shit crazy in this movie. Kills his mom with no consequences and dons her dom gear so he can go murder it up. Then when his uncle shows him real evil, he gets EVILER. Right back at ya uncle! I can do worse and not some how land in prison! Man...Chris steps out one time with that costume and the cops would be man handling him all the way to jail. Especially New York cops....they don't get paid to take your shit. That's for sure. I'm really surprised his gang of ultimate killers did not just threaten him to give them all of his money and then beat him to death and take over. Apparently the Russian chick was paid 5O million by Chris to look like a real life street fighter character and don a cleverly racist name. Wow. In Mother Russia, America pays you!

So what about the other characters? In general a great mixture. Jim Carrey rocks it as Col Stars and Stripes. Turk from Scrubs plays a happy go lucky Dr. Gravity, a vigilante that wasn't even a doctor. lol. The playful mixture of the Justice Forever team seemed to be well-helmed by the Col which is a born again Christian that has a penchant for kindly reminding the members not to take the Lord's name in vain.

Even John Leguizamo, who plays Javier, Chris's body guard, had a decent cameo. Although he
was considerably unrealistic watching the little shit go crazy on the world.

So what bothered me about this film? It was serious when it should have been funny and funny when it should have been serious. There were some REALLY odd moments that should have not been made for laughter. Like the potential rape scene. Poor taste on their part. And the blatant disregard for all the killing they did and the implications of that. Dave's father gets murdered and some how they have time for a funeral that was also cop guarded [how did Dave afford the funeral again?]. If I were Dave's friend...I would have bailed as soon as I saw those cell phone pictures. Who wants to be a part of that? That's real life big boy stuff. Screw that. They were just supposed to be saving lives in cool costumes. Not watch people they love get killed.

I do realize this movie is naturally over the top and that is what I loved about the first movie itself. I think Kick Ass 2 definitely went far over the top of ridiculousness that it was difficult to shut my brain off completely. Did I totally hate it? No. There were some funny moments and I thoroughly enjoy every time Mindy beat some ass or got her revenge. That's the way it should be for me. But I think it was lacking polish, tempo and common sense. It basically ruined the best character of all, Hit Girl and that to me is unforgivable.


This is what I want to do to the people that ruined Hit Girl....

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